Nobody needs to remind me that it's coming on 16 years - I couldn't possibly forget. You can't forget the darkest days of your life, as much as you want to. There is an unseen scar across my heart. There are countless, residual incidents, connected to November 22, 1997.
I've been sorting through photographs - hundreds of photographs, now that I am settled in the Enchanted Forest. Enchanted Forest is the title my friend gave my property when she first saw it.
I wish Michael had been able to see this sanctuary. He would have loved the serenity here in those last two years. He desperately needed a sanctuary away from a media circus, and the pressures of being on an 8 month tour, in the public eye. He was drained, depressed and ill and wanted to hide away. His life had become a mess.
He told anyone who would listen that he 'just couldn't take it anymore'. Take what? There were pressures from multiple fronts; which is a shame because, he was a new father; he was in the midst of recording his solo CD; he was in negotiations with a number of producers regarding his interest in acting. He was looking forward to Christmas and time off in Australia with his family.
But the one thing that I keep in mind, is that he did get the opportunity to hold his baby daughter. He cradled her, and sang to her and lovingly, changed her diapers. He got to see himself in his daughters eyes. It's a shame that she never got to meet her Dad. She will never know what a special man he was. She will never know. Sad. But his music and his image live on. We can all enjoy his special voice; his exciting, charismatic, performances; his winning smile and his quick wit; through videos.
Thank you Ricky, for keeping this site alive. Thanks to all those interested in coming here.
All the best, peace,
November 22, 2013